Awkward Neighbor Situation: Resolution

If you read this post, you know that I have been dealing with smelly, carcinogenic neighbor fumes. If you read this post, you know that smoker neighbor has been intermittently absent. If you did not read either of those posts, this is what the outside of my building looked like at the time of earlier postings.



However, this is what the outside of my building looks like as of today.



That's right, smoker neighbor has not only left his balcony, he has vacated the premises entirely.

I discovered the happy news two weeks ago. It was 7:25am on a Thursday and I was heading out to catch my ride to the train station to leave for Hillsboro. I was in a hurry, but I paused to investigate the packet of papers laying on smoker neighbor's doorstep. I stopped reading after "Thanks for choosing Apex! Please note your lease ends on August 10th at noon. All your belonging must be out of the apartment at that time." I didn't have time for shouting and dancing, but I smiled a toothy grin on my way out.

Even after reading it with my very own two eyes, I was hesitant to accept the move-out date as fact. But, when August 10th rolled around, the balcony was empty and on my way back in from the gym I caught a glimpse of who I can only assume was smoker neighbor heading to the elevator with a box. I can only assume it was smoker neighbor because he left from the apartment next to me and he had blondish-colored hair.

Truthfully, I would not recognize smoker neighbor if he passed me on the street. I only ever caught glimpses of his profile sneakily through my blinds way back when I was trying to figure out where the smoke was coming from. He could have a pink unicorn tattoo on his left cheek for all I know. It might even look like this one.



I digress.

Anyway, I am content to enjoy a secondhand-smoke-free existence in the comfort of my home. I plan on hanging onto the diplomatic solutions I cooked up for my new neighbor and whatever obnoxious vice he/she may have.

Awkward Neighbor Situation: Update

Hang on to your hats people, I might be telepathic. I may also have a cyber-stalker.

Let me explain. It has been approximately ten days since my senses have been assaulted by my neighbor's toxic cigarette smoke. If you read this post, you may note that ten days ago roughly corresponds to the day after I wrote about the issue. Creepy huh?

The way I see it, there are a few viable possibilities here.

1. I am telepathic and my aura of hate projected through the wall I share with smoker neighbor, causing him to inexplicably quit smoking. Ultimately, the fear of my wrath being stronger than his nicotine addiction.

2. Smoker neighbor,who I have never spoken to and would not recognize if I passed him on the street, somehow stumbled on my blog, recognized my schematic of our balconies and was shamed into quitting.

3. Smoker neighbor went on vacation, but will be back to taunt me soon.

4. Smoker neighbor is in the process of moving and for once, the strategy of "ignoring the problem until it goes away" actually worked. [Note, this possibility is substantiated by Jamie claiming to see boxes stacked in smoker neighbors apartment via the glass door leading to the balcony... I haven't tried to look in yet, but as of now the smoking chair and ashtray are still on his balcony]

I am favoring option one, but willing to admit that it could work in tandem with any of the other possibilities.

In any case, I am enjoying my smoke-free environment no matter how temporary it may be, especially since it has been so hot lately that I have to keep my balcony door open. However, I admit I was almost looking forward to what I assumed would be an awkward encounter worth sharing. Who knows, if option three is true I may still need to use the diplomatic solution I was working on. Only time will tell.

Awkward Neighbor Situation

I hate my neighbor. I am going to let you guess what the problem is. Here's a clue, from the street view, my apartment building looks like this.

It is a rough sketch (hyperbole and a half-style,) but I think you get the idea.

If you guessed that my neighbor's nasty, roll-your-own cigarette smoke is wafting into my apartment via my bathroom window and stinking it up with carcinogenic fumes about four times a day, you were right.

Here's the thing. I signed a contract stating that I would not smoke in, or within 30 feet of my apartment building (with threat of a fine.) I am going to go ahead and assume he (the offending neighbor) signed a similar one. Seeing how my balcony extends 4-ish feet from my building (and it was stated explicitly in the contract) that area is off-limits for smoking I am going to venture that his is off-limits as well. So, unless he wants to build a 26-foot extension from his balcony, I have a right to complain about his nicotine addiction.

This has been going on for about 2 months. I would have done something a long time ago, but last term I was gone all day, everyday. That meant that the only one of his fixes I smelled was his late-night smoke. At which point I was already in bed, in my pj's. I don't typically shy away from confrontation with strangers, but I prefer to have these encounters fully dressed.

I figure I have a few options here. I can call my management people and have them fine him (pissing off a neighbor, but saving me an awkward conversation,) or I can warn him myself. Tonight, I am too tired for either.

So, I am going to go to bed and worry about it tomorrow. I think my current strategy can be summed up as "ignore it until it goes away." It hasn't worked very well so far, but I remain hopeful.

PS. Yesterday I made these muffins. They were incredible.

PPS. My building has more than three units in it. I wanted to focus on the relevant factors (I threw the third apartment in for symmetry.)